I didn’t even know this but it was only a couple of months in which I was the happiest and I don’t even know why I just suddenly felt sad than I noticed I lost someone so important to me I now know I will never forget life has a way of bringing things back with no notice I don’t understand just how I can’t forget and leave these feelings behind and just never remember again yet im wondering if he feels the same and if he will ever notice how much hurt that he caused me and if he will ever find a way to fix it yet I know I’m the one who has to live with it and yet I remember that he is probably at this moment the happiest with another that is not me on my day on my special day that is so filled with hatred and anger I will forget and I know one day my life will end and I will live forever with this hate this idea that every person I know can cause it and will crush my heart that I no longer want to have if its full of bullshit

I have different ideas to how I want to forget yet every time I think about him I get other ideas of talking to him again and make it all a fairytale that is perfect yet I know it will never happen cause I’m not Cinderella and he is not prince charming for us to go to the ball and mi running away but one thing is for sure I want to run and never stop #glassslipper#runforever#forget

Finding a way to understand exactly how one feels is difficult and I don’t understand just how I will forget or if I will ever forget I just want to be happy and want he to be happy yet I know how I will never be and the memories are just there and I really don’t want to see them in my path once again forgetting is difficult and I dont understand how people say time heels everything because I don’t know if this bruise will ever leave my skin Cruz its so deep that one day it will be the reason I die #death#forget#memories

Wow its been such a long time since I have written on this thing. So yeah I’m forever alone I tell myself I don’t need love but you know something Lori today asked me if I really don’t believe in love in love anymore? And seriously I don’t know anymore Cuz I really don’t like to think about those things anymore yet I think I feel completely in love and I don’t know how to completely forget but this is sure I know how to ignore…omg I so like this dude named Paul tashian from school he has the nicest eyes lol Jen tapan likes him lol and its so much fun saying things to her about it because he is many of my classes lol but seriously I don’t think I like him I just find him very interesting to look at lol any way I can’t wait to write in this once again
#foreveralone#ignoring
PS hector talked to me again and send me a friend request but I didn’t accept than he took it back :-\ he also has a gf like really wow u give urself 2 months to forget #hate

hoy ivamos hacer4 meses pero ayer tu disitistes romper mi corazon :( y nomas hasta hoy disidio mi corazon nomas llorar tu dises que nomas estava esperando para que rompieras conmigo pero en verdad esperava que siempre estuvieramos juntos en verdad a ti siempre te amare #tristeparasiempre

:’( you can be the peanut butter to my jelly perfect twoAudburn
nose si todavía me quieres

hoy es su cumpleaños de mi babe :-) fuimos con la ely y la lor al lago caminamos mucho y tambien comimos papas al stefanos y no cafe 360 wow jaja la tormenta sandy fue muy duray los dejo como 5 dias sin luz pero hoy yego yeah!!! ayer tuve un sueño muy rarro de que me fui 5 años y regrese y la ely tuvo un nino del junior mi cullado jaja la jojo tuvoun nino y la lor ya mero iba a tener su nino wow me imagino o si iria a pasar… luego lo conoci el pollo otra vez creo que un dia el ya no sera mio y no quiero que pase asi yo que me vaye se esta poniendo mas real #felizytriste

ayer le dije que lo amo y es la verdad no le a dicho a otra persona me dije que no iba a decir hasta que deverda lo sentia y si creo que lo siento y tambien le dije que hace dos dias soñe que me case con el jajaja luego aveses pienso maybe mis sueños se hagan ralidad. pero ahora como le diga que me quiero ir despues de mi senior year para ir a estudiar nose si me esperrar hasta que regrese espero que un dia deverdad estemos juntos para siempre #pensativa

so much to say today? well i said yes to him on the 12 and now i feel so akward next to my dad cuz he saw me kissing me wow but i guess now i cant lie :( and now i have to be good about everything i feel so terrible i cant understand this now a days idk so i wonder how life is going to be #happyyetnot

wow he asked mi to be his novia aaaaaaa :) but i dont know what to say?? should i say yes cuz i do really like him but at the same time i have a feeling that he doesnt really like me like that …should i ask or just say yes #confused

i love this song <33333

wow the school year almost about to end i cant wait summer this year is gonna be fun hoping that i get to hang out with pollo <3 i’m thinking of asking him to go to carnival i think it would be fun :) but first going to atlantic city with family cant wait to see the carnival there again also cant wait to go to pool wow summer gonna be great #summer

yestureday was like a fairytale :) i was outside drawing in the rain and me being wierd as i am i love the rain it makes me happy as could be and he was like ill go get wet with you and i was ok and i was tlaking to him like forever until my mom came and yelled at me for talking to him but before that me and him were outside looking at the rainbow that came out i dont know but it felt really special he always makes me happy he is to nice :D i cant wait till i see him again <33 #waiting 

Wow its been a month i think that i broke up with him and i was the happiest person when i did i wanted to throw a party jajajaja and my life hasnt been better …. and know i have been happy because there is another person i think i like more than a friend and he is so nice and kind to us also he seems like he likes me to hopefully i would love for him to ask me to be his girlfriend cuz that would be something i have dreamed since i started to really talk to him #hopefull